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What breed of troll are you?
| by samuraijack on 01/11/2004 06:43 PM |
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WrongPlanet assists undecided trolls in the community by helping them find a camp.
The Quiz
Yet another *fascinating* piece of court evidence from the Amiga Inc. case appears in the forums. Do you:
a) Laugh wildly and make endless jokes about abject poverty; (-3)
b) Be glad you never buy anything from any company that's not advertised on TV; (0)
c) Say any of the following: "Stop kicking them when they're down", "GROW UP!!!", "Troll!!", "GET A LIFE", "*YAWN*", accuse the poster of masturbation, or blame Bill Buck somehow. (+1)
A MorphOS port of PPaint is announced. Do you:
a) Say how old and crap PPaint is before suddenly changing your mind and saying how GREAT it is when it's announced for OS4 the next day; (+2)
b) Say how old and crap it is and tell everyone how it could never compare to the magical Photoshop; (0)
c) Immediately assume the MorphOS port will be the best ever made. (-2)
bbrv makes a cryptic but tongue in cheek annoucement on ANN about how he'll be ignoring ANN from now on because it's full of trolls, and moving outside the Amiga community. Do you:
a) Ignore it. Genesi only make crap PPC anyway; (0)
b) Immediately assume Genesi is leaving the Amiga market and that AmigaONE will now sell 1000s more units and OS4 will get lots more developers; (+2)
c) Use this chance to point out again how Genesi actually HAVE an OS for their MUCH-cheaper hardware; (-3)
d) Worry that the only company left capable of steering PPC Amiga is on its way out. (-1)
WrongPlanet is:
a) Stupid, insulting and bipartisan; (+1)
b) Funny as hell; (-1)
c) I don't understand the stories, so they're not funny. (0)
AmigaONE is more expensive than Pegasos because:
(a) It's better, because it's a REAL Amiga!!! (+1)
(b) Bill Buck is trying to undercut and destroy the competition by practically giving the things away! (+2)
(c) Eyetech are incompetent, and Amiga Inc. are taking a huge cut of the money to try to pay for legal bills. (-2)
(d) I don't care. I can get a good PC for just 700 euro, you know...waffle...blah...2200MHz...waffle...with monitor and printer! (0)
My site of choice is:
a) MorphZone.org; (+1) (Add +2 if moderator)
b) AmigaWorld.net; (+3) (Add +3 if moderator)
c) Amiga.org, Moobunny, ANN, or something else. (0)
MorphOS is:
a) Yet another niche OS with expensive hardware and no support; (0)
b) The next REAL AmigaOS; (-3)
c) An Amiga-like OS; (-1)
d) NOT Amiga! (+2)
A great new game comes out, and everyone is playing it. Do you:
a) Ignore it. Games are crap anyway; (-1)
b) Immediately start a petition to get it ported or make not so subtle hints in forums about how great it would be to have a port, while developers may be reading; (+1)
c) Simply load up a p2p client and download a copy. (0)
Hyperion Entertainment are:
a) A company that code OS4 and make great games; (+1)
b) The guys that killed the Amiga by keeping Amiga Inc.'s mad ideas of their own licenced OS4 afloat after their lies about "99% done" and "On Schedule and Rockin'"; (-2)
c) Somebody who ports old PC games you don't want anyway. (0)
Amiga.com has just gone down. Do you:
a) Panic; (+1)
b) Immediately jump to the unwarranted conclusion that Amiga Inc. have finally gone bankrupt; (-2)
c) Do absolutely nothing, since you don't visit this site; (0)
d) Play it down by listing many possible excuses for the downtime without knowing the real reason. (+2)
Evidence for Articia bugs is now pretty damning, and at least one company have taken a full bodyswerve away and lost a considerable amount of money doing so. What is your take on it?
a) Articia has bugs. That's obvious by now. (-1)
b) Articia has NO bugs that cannot be patched. The 'evidence' is lies to descredit AmigaONE, just because Genesi can't get the Amiga name. (+2)
c) These things happen when you go for proprietary hardware, that's why I don't. (0)
d) Articia bugs mean everything ever made with them will be totally crap. HAHAHAHAHAHA! (-2)
Bill Buck is:
a) An amusing and eccentric character; (-1)
b) A bit of a loony (+1);
c) Trying to destroy the Amiga! (+2)
d) Yet another Amigaland nobody. (0)
The only AmigaOS clone that has a chance is:
a) MorphOS - because it's the real AmigaOS, name or not; (-1)
b) AmigaOS4 - and it's NOT a clone! (+1)
c) AROS - because it runs on cheap hardware. (0)
You suddenly feel the need to play Speedball 2 again, after all these years. Do you:
a) Get the Amiga out of the cupboard or run UAE, and have a game (0);
b) Decide it's not worth it because the port of UAE you have sucks; (-1);
c) Tell everyone how you can't wait for an AmigaONE to play it on, totally ignorant to the fact it can't play old stuff like this, Amiga name or not. (+1)
The people at AmigaWorld.net start a pathetic thread with content something like "Let's register LucasArts games with Amiga as our computer!! That'll get Lucasarts to think about OS4 and maybe port to us!!" Do you:
(a) Join in. Perhaps it's unlikely, but it won't hurt. (+1)
(b) Laugh at all the poor deluded idiots and write a blow by blow account of why this idea has no chance in hell of working and is just making them and the entire Amiga community look like morons; (-2)
(c) Mention that you already have the game for PC and so wouldn't buy it anyway; (0)
(d) Wholeheartedly join in, putting "G4/1400 MHz" as your processor (even though no AmigaONE has this), and registering multiple times for your friends. (+2)
Amiga Inc. are:
a) The last hope for Amiga! (+1)
b) A bankrupt bunch of incompetents whose greedy grasping to pay off their self-inflicted debts destroyed the Amiga and is still preventing it from ever being going anywhere again with overpriced hardware and software, and stupid dongles; (-2)
c) Some silly company with no hope, no capital, and no chance. (0)
That's the end of the quiz. Now count up your points and click on the page that best fits your score!
The results:
Red Troll: To you, it's black and white - what Amiga Inc. began is Amiga, and everything else is just a sham. You are not interested in cost-effectiveness - after all, you believe in the 'Amiga tax' - even though the price of AmigaONE, parts, and OS4 goes far beyond the typical Amiga tax.
It doesn't matter how long you have to wait and how high the price goes, you'll stick to your guns and defend your choice against the blue trolls. If that means ignoring facts, so be it. After all, that's not new to Amigans.
Blue Troll: You've picked MorphOS and Pegasos as the real Amiga, not only because it's
cheaper, but because you wholeheartedly believe it must be better anyway. You are not
willing to
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