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Encyclopaedia Amigaca
by samuraijack on 12/05/2003 08:43 PM |
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WrongPlanet sets out to document, record and catalogue the various species and sub-species of Amiga users.
PC Amigans (Gatesium Vulgaris Examigum)
Also known as: Windows lovers, Gatesians, x86-fanboys
Habitat: Anywhere that has 3D gamez
Call: "PPC sucks!" or "I don't have enough money for THAT!"
Occurence: 1994 - Present
We thought long and hard about putting this one in our encyclopaedia, for PC Amigans aren't really Amigans any more. Sure, they visit Amiga sites and sometimes feel the need to temporarily ally to one of the other species, but the closest they get to Amigas is the AGA 030/25 A1200 in the cupboard. If they hadn't sold it to keep their PC working with the next version of Windows, that is.
Although generally of better breeding than True Amigans (who isn't?), they constantly proselytise about their now-superior hardware, and we have to wonder why they still wander around the shrinking and backwards habitats of other Amiga species. Literacy varies wildly. Languages include l33t, gamerspeak and technobabble. They are aggressive towards hardware that isn't cheap off-the-shelf stuff, so be careful. While they often have money, we can only assume that they don't want to spend it, a theory supported by the fact that they download their software via peer2peer clients rather than buy it.
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Comments |
The comments are owned by the poster. We are not responsible for its content.
No Subject
Posted on: 2003-12-08 09:36:24
By: Anonymous
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no comments? Where are the trolls?!?! :-)
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Really Funny, Thanks!!
Posted on: 2003-12-08 11:44:25
By: Anonymous
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This is really, really funny. Thanks for starting my week off with some humor!
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Re:
Posted on: 2003-12-09 00:19:46
By: Anonymous
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Gotta say I love it. :) Leans intellectually toward the blue camp...but I Like it That Way. :)
dslcc
Peg1/256MB/Rockin' and On Schedule!
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Re: Re:
Posted on: 2003-12-09 09:36:05
By: Anonymous
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I wasn't going to say this at first, but the only troll that comes close to the discription given to true amigans is actually a blue blooded one from Italy. (The problem wrting, the use of 'LOL', the use of caps etc)
You might know her, she uses the handle EVA, and they don't come blueer then her
Cheers
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Re: no comments? Where are the trolls?!?! :-)
Posted on: 2004-12-06 15:19:50
By: Anonymous
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Not "Where are the trolls?"
You mean : "Where are the 'True Amigans?"
:-P
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Bloodlines
Posted on: 2003-12-08 11:42:51
By: Anonymous
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Someone should build a family tree to show the bloodlines of the species.
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AmigaOneians
Posted on: 2003-12-08 14:51:08
By: Anonymous
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What about the AmigaOne Amigans?
Those who posess the suppossed new official hardware. A motherboard that has no Kickstart, an old fashioned text bios sightly short in features of a C64 BASIC interpreter and doesn't even have an AmigaOS to run on it. Why is it called an Amiga at all? Oh yes, there's a sticker with the Amiga word embedded on it and a processor from the same company as the orginal Amiga if you buy the expensive model.
More expensive than a Pegasos, which is more expensive than an entry level modern Mac. And can only prove one point:
BIOS's rock, in the seventies, before there were no Amigas.
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Re: AmigaOneians
Posted on: 2003-12-08 16:44:22
By: Anonymous
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The AmigaONE is covered under the True Amigan
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Shell tools rock this world!
Posted on: 2003-12-08 17:22:06
By: Anonymous
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I take strong offense to your snide remarks about ports without GUIs, and I will contact my lawyer (the best and most prominent in this market, Ben Hermans) so I can sue your sorry asses back into the stoneage of computers, good luck trying to write these most insulting articles using handperforated punchcards.
See you in court.
Yours sincerely,
Linux A. Migan
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Hey Mr. Unbiased
Posted on: 2003-12-08 19:39:39
By: Anonymous
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It basically looks like a fancy way for the poster to say that any current Amiga fans that aren't using MorphOS are total morons. What about us that have a preference for AmigaOS4/AmigaOne that aren't Amiga Inc. fanatics? I'm an Amiga platform fan, but pretty much consider Amiga Inc. to be irrelevant at this point, but plan to buy an AmigaOne and Hyperion's product AmigaOS4. This is partially as a business decision, as I'm in a group working on software for the Amiga platform, but MorphOS team were so uninterested in the idea of sharing their driver SDK they never responded to my emails to even say "no thanks", and thus MorphOS has no business appeal to me as part of a development team and so I'm not going to buy it or it's hardware host motherboard myself. I their users well, but I'm not one of them. The Eyetech/Hyperion platform does offer me something to develop for so that's what I'm interested in, yet this "history" of users is a bit antagonistic to those in my position and only engourages me to avoid the "blue camp", as rediculous as the whole blue/red camp concept is. I try to consider myself neutral, but things like this make me feel more comfortable in a slightly redder shade of purple, as I'm not going to be a blue fanatic and dont want to be a die-hard red fanatic either...
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Re: Hey Mr. Unbiased
Posted on: 2003-12-08 20:07:37
By: Anonymous
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Noticed that all of them are highly exaggerated yet?
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Re: Hey Mr. Unbiased
Posted on: 2003-12-09 00:05:49
By: Anonymous
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Yet one is strangely different from the rest.. hmmmm...
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Re: Hey Mr. Unbiased
Posted on: 2003-12-09 12:43:09
By: Anonymous
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I agree. It does seem like someone is going a long way to state an opinion. And there's no group for me either, since I don't particularly like Amiga Inc...
Ole-Egil
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Re: Hey Mr. Unbiased
Posted on: 2003-12-09 17:01:26
By: samuraijack
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We were scared that if we criticised MorphOS too much we'd get angry letters from the people who actively use MorphOS as their primary operating system. All twenty of them.
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Re: Hey Mr. Unbiased
Posted on: 2003-12-09 17:52:36
By: Anonymous
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I have not found my speices here, since True Amigans are extinct, I can't include myself there. So I guess I am an amigasaur (dinosaur) then.
Also speaking of colours, I thought we were red/white checked, and going further into the past, rainbow coloured ;-)
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cool
Posted on: 2003-12-09 01:10:32
By: Anonymous
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another zinger, funny.
I guess I'm a PC Amigan, and I have to agree, you don't collect money be spending it, you collect money by getting it, and holding on to it.
for a long time.
erm. possibly forever.
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Re: cool
Posted on: 2003-12-09 12:41:03
By: Anonymous
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I guess that's where I've been going wrong. I haven't been collecting money, I've been collecting computers!
The problem with collecting money is of course that (unless you're a duck) you can't have much fun without spending them. It's not like I could take a bath in coins, however thick my skull might seem at times...
Ole-Egil
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